Skiing

Finally got around to paying for my skiing holiday. It's so much money and to be honest I'd of rather spent it finishing my kitchen but then again I remember how much fun we had last time. For those of you who have never tried skiing I'd have to recommend it as the best activity holiday I've been on. It's definitely worth forking out to join a good ski school as we did. I think you learn so much quicker when you have professional instruction for a week. By the end of our week I felt pretty confident to be able to handle myself on most moderate-intermediate slopes on my own. Though saying that I've not quite mastered the jumps...
Skiing clip

Drag

Greg is a huge fan of Drag Racing and he was telling me the other day about how the tyres become thinner and taller upon acceleration through the centrifugal forces. I thought you may be interested to see what happens just before that effect:
Drag Racing

Halloween Horror!

Today I'm happy, Debbie will be back in just two days (Thursday) and I can't wait. It feels like she's been gone forever and it's been really hard not having her around but she's nearly back so Harrah! Also my Uncle Chris is over from New Zealand for my Mums 60th with his new girlfriend. Plus his daughter Jenny and her bloke are going to be there as well.

Only one week until Halloween and I am once again reminded that it is at this time of the year when an evil ritual is carried out all around the country under our very noses and it's growing in popularity. Stand up for those who can't stand up, Stop the cruelty! Save the Veg!

Save the Veg!

Altered perception

I stumbled across a clip (below) on the Internet today and it brought back memories of when I was learning about ‘perception’ at KIAD and the perculiar question "how does a frog perceive the world?" and thinking what's that got to do with design. Then later as a youth leader being acutely aware of an underlying pain of some of the young people who found it difficult to 'fit in' at school or be accepted in a peer group and more often than not it was because of their 'look'. Maybe they didn't have the right trainers, maybe they had spots, maybe they were a little overweight. Maybe they were a little skinny. I'm guessing every one of us wanted to change something about the way we looked when we were at school. I can't think of a boy who didn't want bigger muscles and the latest trainers, I know I did. Now along way down the line it is blatantly obvious to all of us that advertisers and the media play on this same desire to 'look' good in their pursuit of profit. Most of us live in a world where we are judged by the way we look, whether we like it or not. It's a part of our culture and we've learnt it from childhood up, so we can't blame it all on glossy magazines. I don't think anyone would deny that it's a huge advantage being attractive ('nearly' all of the time) so it's hardly any wonder we desire it. Which leads to the question, what is beautiful? Our perception of beauty can depend on our culture. Some cultures persive a fuller (plump, even fat) figure to be more desirable. Leonardo da Vinci studied human proportions and came up the ‘Vitruvian Man’ as an ‘Ideal’ of body proportions. There have been countless studies into what makes the ideal ‘beautiful’ face including mathematical equations and ‘Eurasian’ a mixed race highbred of perfection. Rather than go into great depth I think it’s safe to say we all ‘know it when we see it’. The point is that someone could never fit that mark because they simply don’t exist, their not real. You would never believe the amount of ‘touching up’ that’s done on photos in tabloid newspapers let alone fashion magazines. We spend so much energy trying to keep up with fashion and not just cloths, our bodies are just as much victims of fashion. Film stars are now re-writing the rulebook with there Size 0 clothes (no the 0 isn’t a mistake) and Eva Longoria is a size 00. It’s been written that ‘0 is the new size 8’ that’s more than unhealthy its dangerous but I’d imagine that in Hollywood you’ll soon be perceived as fat if you’re a 6. It’s ridiculous but that perception it will undoubtedly filter down to Jo pubic just the same as the style of cloths on their backs. I was shocked to see a programme called ‘Extreme Makeover’ where women with low self-esteem and a belly or buckteeth are given every cosmetic ‘enhancement’ under the sun and changed to the degree of being unrecognisable (I’m thinking a bike, brace and some counciling would of sorted that). My fear is that as these type of treatments become more and more accessible, by the time I have kids your going to be the ‘odd one out’ if you’ve got real boobs and your own teeth. Don’t get me wrong I believe you should look after your body, you’ve only got the one (at the moment) so exercise, eat healthy food etc. that’s common sense but if we don’t want our children to live in a world where everything is fake then we all need to love our bodies a little more and look a little further than skin deep (in ourselves and in others) we should (in my opinion) be using Jesus (even Martian L King or someone who has actually done something would be a huge step up) as our ideal not Paris Hilton – and stop buying those flipping magazines!

Alter your perception

One in a million

To the best brother-in-law in the world. Happy birthday Lee, hope you have a fab day.

Air mail

Yay, I got a postcard from Debbie today (can't think why she got me a card with a frog on it, lol). I think it got muddled in the post because mum and dad got theirs ages ago. It says:

Hey babe, we have just got back from Darwin having done a 3 day, top end tour of Oz. Went to Kakado National Park and saw loads of Crocs and great Aboriginal art. Also went to Edith Falls, swimming was great. Going to Ayers Rock tomorrow before heading to Perth on the West Coast. Miss you tons, lov you honey. Debbie xxx

We all miss you tones too, especially me. Kitchins going well now and managed to muddle through without a plumber so far (no flood, fingers crossed). I see your on your way to Bangkok tomorrow. Hope you have an amazing time. Wish I was there with you. lov you tons Richard xxx

Holidays are coming

Somebody at work yesterday mentioned Christmas is only 9 weeks away. It’s shocking how quickly things come around, so rather than be my usually unorganised mess I thought I’d turn over a new leaf (before it drops off) and sort out what I’m going to be doing now.

Firstly, All Saints’ Eve (that’s All Hallows’ Eve or Halloween to you heathens, lol) is almost upon us and I was wondering if anyone had anything planned. If not would anyone be interested in coming to a fancy dress Barbecue at mine? I am thinking that Saturday 4th November would be the most appropriate weekend.

Secondly, I’ve had a tradition for a long-long time to go to St Paul’s on Christmas Eve for midnight mass. It’s not a particularly riveting service though it does help remind me of what it’s all about, something that’s easily lost in the ever-lengthening run up to Christmas. I also quite enjoy singing a few carols once a year. I thought it would be nice if this year we meet down a Pub and those how wish to continue to Church can go and those who would rather get an early night can wonder off when they feel the need.

And last but not least New Years Eve, this is an event I often overlook and therefore rarely do anything pre-planned. I think it would be good if this year we sorted something out, even if it’s just meeting down the Pub for a few pints and a laugh. It’s always good to have something to look forward to don’t you agree…

Dying to get in

The manager of an apartment house was surprised to find the legs of a corpse sticking out an apartment window. Police entered the apartment and found the deceased man's head soaking in a sink full of hot water.
Apparently the out-of-work Austrian had returned home after a night of drinking and drugs. He decided to slip in through the kitchen window. The window was fixed at the base and tilted out, giving him just enough room to squeeze his head through as far as the sink before he got stuck. While flailing around trying to escape, he turned on the hot water tap.
Police were not sure why he had not turned off the water, pulled the plug, or--perhaps most important--entered through the front door, since they found the keys in his pants pocket.
(26 May 2004, Wolfsberg, Austria)

Beyond the Horizon (making monkeys out of men)

Many of you may of seen last nights episode of Horizon ‘Chimps are humans too’ which prodictably drove (‘I woke up this morning and decided’) along a predetermined path towards 'proving' (not) in any way possible (regardless of common sense, let alone science) that Chimps should be classed as human. Comparing fully grown Chimps to babies, mentally disabled and the clinically insane is not a good benchmark. Nor is throwing around %’s through the whole programme, like saying that they have a 99.4% DNA match. I found that it there are differnt results - ‘Dr Wildman's team found that chimps and humans are 99.4% similar, other researchers last year put the similarity at around 95%; the figure you get depends on precisely which genetic differences you look at’. There was even a scientist in that programme that said "well all this shows is what a huge difference a tiny amount of DNA can make" and something like: "some DNA controls what other DNA does, may be the different DNA is control DNA?"
Did you now we have 46 chromosomes and chimps have 48, sound pretty close I make it 95.8%. That’s pretty close until I tell you a Potato has 48 chromosomes does that make us 95.8% Potato? Cannibal!
Other examples they use to justify so called Humanness included:
‘They are anatomically similar’ – didn’t say much about the differences like there feet
‘They use tools’ – Sea Otters use stones to break through shells open shells, Dolphins use sea sponges to protect there snouts when foraging for food on the sea bed, load of birds use tools including South American Macaw that actually fashions pieces of wood and hold them in there beak to open pine nuts. Elephants break off branches and use them to swat flies.
‘They have culture’ – ‘while it's difficult to study dolphins and whales closely in the wild, some biologists suspect that cetaceans rival chimpanzees when it comes to culture’.
They can perform human tasks – mimicking human behaviour doesn’t make you human I can mimic a dog. You can teach a dog to fetch, speech (bark), sniff drugs out, attack, guide you around (guide dog) ect.
‘They have language’ Do they though? (not to be confused with communication) - You can teach a parrot to speak any words. Most animals have some form of communication. Bees have a very complex communication so do Marine Mammals. But non have ‘language’
The following properties of human language have been argued to separate it from animal communication:
'Arbitrariness:' There is no rational relationship between a sound or sign and its meaning (There is nothing "housy" about a house.) 'Cultural transmission:' Language is passed from one language user to the next, consciously or unconsciously.
'Discreteness:' Language is composed of discrete units that are used in combination to create meaning.
'Displacement:' Languages can be used to communicate ideas about things that are not in the immediate vicinity either spatially or temporally.
'Duality:' Language works on two levels at once, a surface level and a semantic (meaningful) level.
'Metalinguistics:' Ability to discuss language itself.
'Productivity:' A finite number of units can be used to create an infinite number of utterances.

The programme simply proves that Chimp and Human bodies share some ‘design’ characteristics and that many animals are far cleverer than people think. The thing that really peeves me is that this sort of programme yet again reinforces the ‘mater-to-man’ theory that 99.4% (do you like the irony) of people outside the scientific community take as fact.

Sources include: BBC, Natonal Geographic, Wikipedia the free encyclopedia

Watch a Crow make a tool
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Another near miss

Sometimes I think I have a target painted on my car. I don't know how I managed to avoid this one but I'm so happy my lovely car wasn't totaled. I was so relieved that we didn't crash that I was extremely polite to the other driver. The worrying thing was that when I pulled over to speak to the Elderly Indian Gentleman he seemed not to have grasped the concept of giving way to the right! Watch out, it could be you next!
(he drove a bright green Ford CA - I've shown it as the red car in the pic as my car's green too).

Birthday Girl

Had another busy day, Photography meeting at work went well. Then round the flat for a bit more tiling. Bit risky using one of those circular saw type cutters out side the back door it the dark. Had a bit of a dilemma whether to see better and risk getting chips in my eye's or whether or to wear sunglasses and risk shorting the length of my fingers. Opted for the latter and got away with it this time (praise God). Debbie rang today (Yahoo!). Tried to ring her all weekend through one of those cheap international numbers, not much good if you ask me, kept getting cut off after about 30 seconds though knowing me I was probably doing something wrong. I mean how hard can it be to make a poxy phone call? Oh well all is well now, and I found out where they hide the corkscrew, in a cupboard above the cooker. Why there I ask myself (secretly think it is a conspiracy to keep me out of there wine rack - resistance is futile) though I know they're entitled to do with it what they want.
Worked out that they've got didgi TV on the computer which I'm ecstatic about as I've managed to somehow render the didgi box on the tele inoperable (surprise-not). Watched Birthday Girl tonight, really good film. Not an Oscar winner in any way but the kind of film that I love (though I love loads of types of films, they just have different things to offer). You know, boy meets girl, bit of turmoil, things go Pete Tong and you think 'Oh no!' there doomed (well at least you pretend to yourself and play along) but some how everything works out and they live happily ever after, (with the added bonus of 'Nicole-the-gorgeous-Kidman' thrown in for good measure) nice bit of escapism. Got to go now trying to watch a Korean war film called Brotherhood - gruesome...

Birthday Girl Page

Clip of the month

Super Colossal clip
Super Colossal music video

Quote of the month

"Oh God no, I couldn't stand it! I'd go mad or sane. I don't know which." - Rosaleen Norton 1952
(When asked whether she ever considered leading an ordinary life)

A bit down under

Umm, yes another interesting evening. Kind of opted out of DIY for some R&R. Even that was a saga. ‘Bloody hell’ where’s the cork screw! I mean all I wanted was a nice quite evo with a glass (or four) of nice, lovely, juicy red wine (Only £7 for two at your local BP Garage, I couldn’t bring myself to raid Robin’s reserves ‘yet’) but what I got was a shower of crimson stain as I forced the cork into the bottle. I must sound like a complete wining Muppet (believe me I’m not) but nothing is ever straightforward in this life. May be that’s why I long for the next, though in some ways that’s what I love about this one, it’s so unpredictable, exciting, risky, dangerous, addictive (Debbie I miss you x) **** I’ve just knocked the bottle over, (no lie) I’m dead Ahh, (5 mins of frantic cleaning) Why do I feel that was slightly predictable? I mean if I knew it was going to happen I wouldn’t of planted it on the floor (on a make shift caster, post-it note mind) Yet I sense ‘de ja vo’ (I’m dreadful at English so don’t expect correct French). I’ve done a bloody good job of cleaning the cream carpet if I say so myself, though I may have to delete this line as it’s kind of a smoking gun. Anyway this wine is bloody good (still got another bottle though I’m actually struggling to see the screen as it is). I tried to call my ‘Boo’ this morning but no joy, and as the postcard hasn’t materialised yet I thought I’d cheer myself up with some Aussie thoughts.

Ok for starters if Australia is so great why are all the Aussies working in Bars over here? Let’s look at the facts:

* ‘ALCOHOL!‘- It has been reported that the first European settlers in Australia drank more alcohol per head of population than any other community in the history of mankind.
*Sir John Robertson, five times premier of New South Wales, drank a pint of rum every morning for 35 years. Later said 'none of the men who have left footprints in this country have been cold water men.
* In 1954, Bob Hawke was immortalised by the Guinness Book of Records for sculling 2.5 pints of beer in 11 seconds. Bob later became the Prime Minister of Australia.
*Australia is the smallest, flattest, and ‘DRIEST! ‘, inhabited continent in the world. It is the only country, which is also a whole continent. (Umm I’m seeing a theme. It’s suddenly dawned on me why Debbie’s such a fan (tong in cheek… or neck in rope!).

I’m not being funny but why is it that everything that moves in Australia is a killer?

*The male platypus has a poisonous spine that can kill a dog and inflict immense pain on a human.
* The box jellyfish is considered the world's most venomous marine creature. The box jellyfish has killed more people in Australia than stonefish, sharks and crocodiles (stingrays :( poor Steve) combined. R>*The Sydney Funnel web spider is considered the world's most deadly spider. It is the only spider that has killed people in less than 2 hours. Its fangs are powerful enough to bite through gloves and fingernails (Debbie once said she had a Redback in the shower, apparently this doesn't mean that the water was too hot, but that she narrowly escaped being killed by a deadly spider).
The Fierce Snake or Inland Taipan has the most toxic venom of any snake. Maximum yield recorded (for one bite) is 110mg. That would probably be enough to kill over 100 people or 250,000 mice, (and we moan about daddy-long-legs and the odd rain cloud).

Mind you it does have it's upside, people are so pre-occupied with avoiding the wildlife that crime is 400% lower than in the US. Or is that more down to CANNABIS?

*Cannabis arrests- In 1999, 46,000 Australians were arrested for possession or use of Cannabis.
*Cannabis use - It is estimated that 50% of Australians aged 14-19 are active users of Cannabis.
*Cannabis industry - The sale of illegal cannabis industry constitutes 1 percent of Australia's GDP and is twice the size of the Australian wine industry.

There’s defiantly a bit of course and effect going on here:

* Swimming - In 1838 it was declared illegal to swim at public beaches during the day! This law was enforced until 1902.
Dawn Fraser is the only athlete to ever win gold in the same event at three consecutive Olympics. At the 1964 Olympics, Dawn Fraser marched in the opening ceremony and wore a custom made swimsuit. For these breaches of protocol, the Australian Swimming Federation banned her from competition for ten years (a bit harsh one thinks).
Susie Maroney is a swimmer who from time to time feels inclined to swim long distances - such as Cuba to Florida (yeh, cos she can’t swim in Aus even though there’s 36,735km of coastline and if she did she’d get skewered, stung or eaten, and if she survived that they’d through her in jail!).

I mean if 70% of the population choose to live in the 10 largest cities, then it's safe to prosume they must be the best bits those cities are:
(only 1% are of Aboriginal descent, probably because most of them came to there senses long ago and buggered off to pastures green)

Sydney - Australia's first and largest city. Also known as Sin City. Wanted to be Capital of Australia but its convict stigma counted against it.
Melbourne - Wanted to be the Capital of Australia on the basis that it was the home to the Australian establishment and was not founded by Convicts. (Founded by John Batman; son of a Convict)
Canberra - Because Sydney and Melbourne kept bickering over which city should be the capital of Australia, it was decided that neither of them would be capital and instead, a new capital would be built in the middle of them both (I like that logic).
Hobart - Australia's second oldest city. The too-frequent visits by French explorers concerned the British authorities and in 1803 it was decided that a colony should be established on the island to secure British territorial claims. Convicts were then sent.
Newcastle - Newcastle's coal deposits were discovered by a party hunting escaped Convicts. Sydney's difficult Convicts were then sent to Newcastle to mine the coal. Known as an egalitarian city where miners and winemakers share a beer or a fine drop.
Adelaide - Claim to fame is that it is a City that has lots of Churches. Adelaide is the Capital of the only Australian state never to have received Convicts. Is universally recognised as a hole (they must of miss spelt whole).
Perth - The last Australian state to receive convicts. It has been said most of them now work in parliament or business.
Brisbane - In 1824, a southern state governor sent a party of difficult Convicts to found a new settlement in Queensland. These days, southern state children send their difficult parents to Queensland to retire. Also a Mecca for Southern State teenagers, who upon finishing school, l head north for a week of booze and debauchery (sounds like the new Bournmouth).

Yeh, yeh I'm well awear that I’m jealous my Fiancée is scooting around the four corners of the glob while I’m stuck here bashing incoherent gobbledegook into a keyboard, but it passes time and heck my glass suddenly feels half full... O' it is…

All for One

Congratulations to Greg and Rachael for their first child Layla. Born on Sunday with the assistance of Gas and Air (no I wasn’t referring to Greg or Rachael though they may of had something to do with it) Layla entered our world for the first time. Getting off to less than perfect start when you have a 'Martin' for a dad means she’s going to need all the help she can get (only joshing). I’m really looking forward to meeting your little bundle of joy and I’ll be praying that God would protect her and bless her with a happy and fulfilling life…

Hell's kitchin

Well I've been up to my neck fitting a new Kitchen for the past week, and I've had enough already. Working a full day then having to 'DIY' all evening is taking it's toll. I keep running into problems, I can't get the flaming taps unscrewed and even if I could the stop cock doesn't work so that would spell disaster. Ho Hum (as Debbie would say). I've decided that plumbing is best left to the professionals, because the last thing (Bob and Hazel down below wouldn't be best pleased) we all need is a flood. O’well I feel like I've started to make a bit of headway, as most of the cupboards are up and I've made a start on the tiling. Though unfortunately I’ve inherited a kitchen that's tiled from floor to ceiling with tiles of the William Morris era (those of you who have made it round to my humble abode will know what I'm talking about) and thus am forced to retile the entire kitchen. Now you have to understand I find tiling a daunting job at the best of times and I just know it's going to be an epic challenge and one I'm not savouring. Anyhow it‘ll all be worth it when it’s done, only 4 weeks till Debbie’s back from Australia (miss you x) and I promised her it would be finished (no pressure then) note to self – never make promises…

First Post

Jonny had a brain wave (his bright like that!) and thought of a fab way to keep in tough with loads of people with the minimum of effort (minimal is always good). So as my phone is out of action I thought it would be a good opportunity to join in the hyper test fun. Well I guess here it goes...